More of the children I met in Uganda....

Some of the Children I met in Uganda....

The Day My Heart Broke in Uganda

Thursday, February 21, I met our second sponsored child, Isaac. This was the day of the trip that my heart just broke. Isaac was very shy. He seemed more than shy; he seemed sad. I asked the orphan field worker what was wrong and he told me that Isaac was, in fact, sad. He was worried about his mother and his sister. His mother was at the hospital (which was a distance away) with his younger sister, Annette. She is dying. She was born HIV positive. The mother is HIV positive. I asked if Isaac was too and they said that he hasn’t been tested.

He knows that his sister will die. He hadn’t seen his mother for several days. He was being cared for by others in his village. I just wanted to pick him up and bring him home.

I gave Isaac his small gifts – flip flops, book bag, some school supplies, family pictures, a Torrance High School football cap and a picture of Aaron in his football uniform. He loved the hat and the picture, those seemed to be his favorite.

This was definitely a different kind of visit. He wasn’t playful. I had my hand on his shoulder and was just praying silently for him and I just felt an overwhelming (I am over using that word, I know) feeling of sadness and heaviness.

His school was within walking distance, so he walked me to his class and showed me the room. I talked to him and asked questions through an interpreter. It was tough to connect with him. I just wanted to hold him, but time slipped away and it was time for him to leave. I walked him to the path that led to his village and watched him walk into the distance. I began crying and quickly it turned to sobbing. I just felt so helpless. I want to help him. If I was really the “mommy” that was introduced to him, I would be doing so much more to protect him; but I don’t know what to do. So, I cried. I prayed.

As I turned around to walk toward the bus there was a little girl just waiting for me to turn around. She grabbed my hand and happily walked next to me as I tried to dry up my face. As I looked at this new, little, round, dirty face, I wondered, “What is this child’s story?” They surely all seem to have a story. I can only hope that somehow, we can make a difference.

Click below to view a photo album of Isaac:
http://www.kodakgallery.com/I.jsp?c=1c9kqrn.b6zykxc7&x=0&y=-6pl44q

A few of my favorites.....

I do not have all of my pictures loaded and will not make you look at all of them...but, here click here to view some of them...I will update more later this week:

http://www.kodakgallery.com/I.jsp?c=1c9kqrn.bzx7tdjb&x=0&y=n0uzxp

Orphan Sponsorship – The Reality

Our family has sponsored two orphans in Uganda through Hope 4 Kids International (H4KI) for approximately three years – Catherine and Isaac. We had two other children through another organization (World Vision) prior to that, but were informed that they were no longer in the program right around the time that we took on these children in Uganda. We decided to stick with the H4KI sponsorships because all of the money that we send goes to the children. (No administration fees are deducted)

So, each month we have an automatic deduction of $26 per child from our checking account. We receive an update and correspondence from the child once or twice per year. We pray for them daily. But, all of these things are so automatic and routine that I tend to forget that these are real children with real needs and that our money (little as it is) is really impacting their lives and should be impacting our lives more than it is.

Darrin has had the chance to meet Catherine and Isaac in 2006. He met them and gave them a face to the family that was reaching out to them. I was very much looking forward to meeting them as well.

On Wednesday, February 20, in a village called Mumatumba (love saying that word!), I met Catherine. What a beautiful girl! She is very shy and doesn’t speak English well yet (she will continue to learn English in school). Her parents have died (most are orphaned because of AIDS). She is being cared for by her grandfather. He joined the visit as well. Her uncle, Joshua, is a field officer for the orphan program. He knows Darrin well and introduced me to Catherine as her mommy and told me, “She is very humble, just like a Potter.” (Referring to Darrin). He said she fits right in with my family. I brought a few gifts to give to her – a Bible story book from Emily, a letter and drawings from Rachel, a little red dress that I had purchased on the clearance rack at Walmart for $6, and a small stuffed animal. She was very grateful. Oh, and I laminated a family picture and in that picture, Emily is wearing the same dress as the one I bought her.

We didn’t speak the same language. She wasn’t overly affectionate (most kids there eat up any and all affection you give them), but I felt such a connection to her. This was real! It was so much more than $26 a month! She is my daughter, entrusted to us for care. She looked at me like my children look at me.

After I gave her the small gifts, we just hung out together. Some other team members brought some toys to play with the children. We went outside (we had been in a church building) and played with bubbles. I got some great shots of Catherine. Once she got the hang of the bubbles, she thoroughly enjoyed it. We were sitting down on a bench and I had my arm around her. She was a little distanced from me; not sure of her comfort level. Suddenly, a little boy that had just gotten out of school was running up the road toward us. He had his sights on me and was running as fast as he was able. He ran to me as if he had known me forever. He went to the arm that wasn’t around Catherine and wrapped himself around me with the biggest hug. At this, Catherine came into me and hugged me. She seemed to give him a look that said, “Back off, she’s mine.” :-) We gave her and her grandfather a ride on our bus to the road to their village. She sat on my lap the whole way. Great memories!

She is still working on my heart. I am very concerned about her living in that far away village with her grandpa. He seemed very loving and looked at her as if he treasures her. But, I know she is still going without some very basic resources. It made me think about sending her to boarding school. This is the next level of sponsorship through the orphan program. In boarding school they have a home, bed, regular meals, the school curriculum is stronger (she loves science by the way) and with much smaller class sizes. We are praying about this to see if it is possible that we can do this. My heart was so touched by her. I also met some sponsored children that have benefited from boarding school and have since gone on to a university. Amazing transformation and hope!

The night that I met Catherine, my heart was sort of heavy. I felt sad to leave her and regretted how little priority I had put on communicating with her for the past years. I resolved to talk to Darrin about boarding school and promised myself that I would make her a greater priority for our family.

((Please view photo album of Catherine here:
http://www.kodakgallery.com/I.jsp?c=1c9kqrn.chv43f8n&x=0&y=-hwl58o

Purpose

In one of my earlier posts, prior to leaving for Uganda, I mentioned that I wasn’t sure how I would be used, but I felt that God was telling me that it would be to bring women together to encourage and support one another. I couldn’t see how I could do this, but after one day in our women’s training sessions it was clear that this would be a theme for all of us.

I was asked to teach a training class for several days on budgeting. The woman that was to lead this class fell ill and was not able to make the trip. Thankfully, another team member, Stacy, stepped up to help me out.

The first day of the women’s training was so exciting; yet, so intimidating. When we arrived at the Smile Africa property there was a large group of women singing and dancing and praising God for sending us to them. When the classes and the teachers were introduced, ours was introduced as being able to help these women manage their money and run their businesses. They cheered wildly ---- no pressure!!!

Stacy and I had one of the largest groups (gulp!). We decided to spend the first day of training gathering information about the women’s businesses and income, expenses, etc. When we left that day, we were pretty discouraged. We came there with our ideas of business --- Stacy has experience managing a law firm and I have experience working in the corporate world. These widows that we were getting to know had businesses such as:

· Growing and selling produce
· Poultry farming
· Hand crafting/bead making
· Fish mongering

Their income? Most of them made the equivalent of less than $1-$2 per day. Their expenses? The largest expenses that these women have are their children’s school fees (school is NOT free) and medical care. They also have to pay rent, but those expenses were less. They have no electric, gas or utility bills as we do. If I could guess an average number of children of these women, I would say they each had an average of 5 children each. However, many are now raising their grandchildren or other family members’ children as well. Food wasn’t a very large expense because they all plant and live off of what they can grow and buy minimal food from elsewhere; that is a luxury.

It was clear that we were out of our element! How do you teach “budgeting” to this group of women? Stacy and I were greatly frustrated and discouraged. We went to bed agreeing to pray and brainstorm in the morning before our next session.

When we got together, we found that an observation that we both had made is that each of our groups (we had split into sub groups for gathering information) had much in common, but one glaring theme was that they did NOT work together. Each one is struggling with their own problems and sharing information and supporting one another was a foreign idea to them.
We spent the next few sessions introducing this idea. We arranged them into groups of like businesses and asked them to share ideas, stories of success and failure, etc. in their businesses. For some groups, this was painful. They were so quiet and just sat there staring at me. I was tempted to get involved, but knew that I needed to let them work through their barriers. We would only be there a short time and we want this communication to continue long after we are gone. By the end of this session, conversations were happening. It was a start; baby steps.

One of our groups – poultry farming – really got into sharing. They told us that they were very excited because they had learned new things from one another, the most exciting being how to castrate a rooster. I didn’t even question the value of this information, but it must be of value to them! :-)

The next days were still painful for Stacy and I. We are sure that there were several lessons packed in this for us. More will become clear as time goes on, but we both agreed that we were learning a lot about our lives at home and our priorities.

Stacy went with Laverne and Tom (founder of Hope4Kids) to meet with a group about micro financing opportunities for the widows in Uganda. They received a proposal on a program. This is very exciting. We are still working out the program, but one of the requirements for the microfinance loan is that the groups requesting the loan must have 15-30 members. The very theme we were teaching these women the past few days – working together!

In our last 2 sessions we spent time explaining the vision of the resource training center that we are committed to fundraising for and making it happen. The center will have classes on many skills (from learning English/reading/writing to business math and budgeting and skills such as sewing and various animal farming). They are very excited about the center and it can’t come soon enough. However, we know that raising money and building and staffing will take at least 2 years. They were cheering and dancing at this announcement. It gives them great hope. We asked them to commit to praying and planning on the Ugandan side; to remain involved in the planning – this is their center.

We then discussed micro financing and the group concept. Cheering, dancing and praising ensued. They also had many questions. Many are leery of any type of loan. They have witnessed the corruption by others, high interest rates and feel safety just being dependent on themselves. We continued to encourage them that working together, being accountable to one another, etc. is much more beneficial for them and their families. You could see the women sit up a little straighter and become a little more confident, dignified, and hopeful for their futures.

Our last session was tough to end. I don’t think Stacy or I realized the impact that we had on these ladies or the impact that they had on us. At the end of the session, the ladies just sat there. Normally, they were singing and dancing and hugging us. I asked one of our interpreters why they were so quiet. She said that they were filled with sorrow because they knew that we would be leaving. She said that we had given them such love and hope that they didn’t want to say goodbye. Then, a few of the ladies presented us with gifts. One lady, Regina, stood up and told them all that the Bible says it is better to give than to receive. She said that we had come and left our families and responsibilities behind to give ourselves to them, so she wanted to give us something. She had made each of us a doormat. A few others came forward with their gifts. How humbling! These women are struggling for basic necessities yet gifting us?!

In the end, there was a lot of hugging, some tears, but much hope. We saw so much growth in them in such little time. These women are fighting to break out of the cultural stigma of their role as a widow, to rise above and be self sufficient and able to care for their families. They opened up their lives and their hearts to us. Now we will forever have them in our hearts. They have taught us much.

Postings to Come....

Uganda was amazing! I am going to just post some of my thoughts as I am able to process everything. As I keep saying, the whole experience was so overwhelming that I could not possibly process everything while there or I would have been an emotional basket case at all times.

I know sat and wrote some yesterday and know that my posts may be quite long. I understand that not everyone will want or have the time to read them all. Thank you for looking!

Jodi

On transit back home

Jambo! (that's swahili for hello :-))

I am now sitting in the Amsterdam airport. About 22 hours ago we boarded a bus in Tororo and headed for the Entebbe airport. After a LONG bus ride, we had a great dinner at a Chinese restaurant, Fang Fang. Chinese is NOT my favorite food, but boy did it taste good! Who knew that Africa would have such good Chinese food!

Our flight to Amsterdam was a very good. We are praying for more room on the flight to Detroit and another good flight.

Uganda was so overwhelming. I still don't think I have been able to process all of my experiences. I will post again when home and rested.

Jodi

Finally an update

Hello from Uganda! I am sorry that I have not been able to update as of yet. Today is the first day that I could get away to get to town to the Internet café. At this point, it has taken me 8 minutes just to connect, so not the greatest connection. I do not know how often I will be able to update. The H4KI website will be updated at least sometimes, so please check that one (link below) for pictures and updates from Rachel and the team.

I have been in a state of just being overwhelmed – with the poverty, with the smells, with the kindness and love in the people. I wish I had time to write all that I have experienced this far.

After 24+ hours of travel, we arrived in Entebbe. For 7 of us, our luggage did not. It seems our luggage got mixed up in Detroit and took a different path through Kenya. We did finally get it the next day after a very long morning waiting. Once we got our luggage, we began our 6 hour drive to our hotel. Needless to say, we were all exhausted upon arrival.

I don’t have time for a ton of details, but to summarize our days thus far….

We began our day on Friday at Smile Africa ministries. When we arrived, 382 children were lined up singing to us. They were so excited that we had come to see them. It was very difficult to hold back the tears. Then, we went on to meet with the widows and a large group of women greeted us with singing and dancing. This is a greeting everyone should experience!

Saturday we attended a wedding of an orphan field worker, Kleffus. This wedding was 5 hours long!! (plus it started an hour late, so 6 hours in the church). It was amazing and beautiful and interesting. I will give more detail at another time.

Sunday we had church. Did you know that they have church ALL day long? We only attended for 3 hours or so. What an incredible experience. I cannot remember when I ever danced and sweated so much! These people know how to rejoice. After the FIRST offering, we danced for 15 minutes! Everyone in the whole entire church – up on their feet celebrating! Wow! Then, if that wasn’t enough, there was a party in the bush (jungle) for one of our teammates on this mission, Mae. She has been here 5 times and the people know and love her. These people that have so little poured out all that they had to celebrate and feed about 300 people. Then, several of us spent the night in a mud hut. I will definitely be writing more of that experience!

Today (Monday) we had another women’s training for many widows. I think we had at least 180 show up today. I had been elected to teach women about budgeting and finance (I know, get a good laugh)…but after discussions with these women, we shifted the focus of our topic and are working on implementing some ideas for these women to be more successful in their current businesses and work together (a foreign concept to them).


I will write more at another time about our time here, but please look at our pictures at H4KI site.

We are loading photos to the H4KI site. Please check it out (hope4kidsinternational.org – international missions – Africa – photos – February 2008).

In summary, I am OVERWHELMED. The people are beautiful and amazing!

Will write more later…

jodi

In Transit for the next day +++++

Tomorrow is the big day. I have two bags that are bulging at the seams; not so much with my stuff, but gifts that people have contributed to the people in Uganda and the projects in which we will be involved. I think I am over the weight limit (okay, I know I am), but am hoping that the lovely people at Northwest Airlines will be compassionate and not make me lighten the load much.

I had a very busy day. It started out about 1am with my youngest, Emily, awakening me with an earache. We went to the couch and I micro-waved a moist heat pad to put on her ear to comfort her so that she could finally get some rest until we could get to the doctor in the morning (yes, she has an ear infection now ;-(). As I was sitting on the couch trying to hold her in just the right position to comfort her and bring sleep, I wondered about the women I have yet to meet in Uganda. What do they do at 1am with a sick child? They don’t have the conveniences of the microwave or a doctor on every corner with a prescription pad ready to write a prescription to end the pain immediately, a pharmacy stocked full of the medications that we need and an insurance card that makes the costs of these conveniences bearable.
I guess I am trying to prepare my heart for all that lies ahead in the next few weeks. But, I am not sure that anything within my imagination can do so.

I was able to spend a little time with my family and friends today. Just ask my friend, Dina, how hectic this day was. She had a rough one, yet still managed to come through in helping me get ready for this adventure ---Even taking us to Wilderness park to have a wonderful lunch together (where above picture was taken with Emily). Thanks, Dina!!!

Wish me luck and I hope this gets updated within the next two weeks. Just don’t forget to check the Hope4Kids blog for definite updates (link at the bottom of my page).

Continually grateful for you prayers, love, and support!

Jodi

Thoughts on upcoming trip.....One Week to Go

Only one week to go now! I apologize that today’s update is so long, but it was on my heart. Thank you again for your many prayers and support!

Something came to my mind as I was reading yesterday. I am reading a book called “Sex God – Exploring the Endless Connections Between Sexuality and Spirituality” by Rob Bell (who says Christian books are boring :-) ~ hey, I bought it AT church!).

Chapter two caught my attention in the title alone – God Wears Lipstick. What the heck is this about? I had to read on. The basic theme of the chapter was that we de-humanize and objectify people. Examples were given from the grotesque to the simple, almost un-noticeable ways that we do this in every day life.

Once of my favorite paragraphs in the chapter:

(there are)…”Moments when all of the ways that we divide ourselves and rank each other and convince ourselves of how different, better, and unalike we are disappear, and we are faced with the fact that first and foremost, we are humans. In this together and not that much different from each other.”

I have shared with some that my first reaction to the tea parties that are done on the Uganda trips for the widows, well, I just didn’t get it. I thought…these ladies need FOOD, MEDICINE, BEDS, etc. Seriously -- lipstick, nail polish? How are these things important in their lives? Well, I have changed my mind based on the witness of the people that have been there and experienced it and have seen the hope and dignity that this time with them brings.

In this reading yesterday, it really hit home for me. There was a story about a concentration camp in Germany. There is an excerpt from a British soldier that described the disgusting, tragic conditions that they encountered when they liberated a camp called Bergen-Belsen. The British soldier’s name was Colonel Mercin Willet Gonin DSO. I won’t go into the details of the horror that he saw, but it was definitely, like all concentration camps, designed to strip people of their humanity. I am going to type in the details of something that happened during their stay at the Bergen-Belsen concentration camp:

"It was shortly after the British Red Cross arrived, though it may have no connection, that a very large quantity of lipstick arrived. This was not at all what we wanted, we were screaming for hundreds and thousands of other things and I don’t know who asked for lipstick. I wish so much that I could discover who did it, it was the action of a genius, sheer unadulterated brilliance. I believe nothing did more for these internees than the lipstick. Women lay in bed with no sheets and no nightie but with scarlet red lips, you saw them wandering about with nothing but a blanket over their shoulders, but with scarlet red lips. I saw a woman dead on the postmortem table and clutched in her hand was a piece of lipstick. At last someone had done something to make them individuals again, they were someone, no longer merely the number tattooed on the arm. At last they could take an interest in their appearance. That lipstick started to give them back their humanity.

Because sometimes, the difference between heaven and hell, may be a bit of lipstick.”

Wow! So, when you see pictures of us loving on these women and putting otherwise frivolous cosmetics on them, just remember that we are a part of this – We will be meeting their needs of food, shelter, etc. but, first and foremost, we will be reminding them that they are HUMAN beings. They are not objects or numbers in the vast expanse of widows in Uganda that appear to be forgotten by the world. They are beautiful, children of God. Created by Him in His image.

“For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” Ephesians 2:10 (NIV)

Teamwork to Spread Love

Karamojong children -- grateful to receive a meal, courtesy of Smile Africa.

This past Saturday we had a mission team meeting to get details about our trip and we packed some bags with supplies to take to Uganda. Each of us will take one bag of supplies in addition to our one personal suitcase. These bags are filled with stuff that generous people have donated that will spread some love to so many in Uganda. We have lots of flip flops, scarves, tons of beanie babies (amazing what this little gift will do to brighten the faces of the orphans on the other side of the world), clothes, books, puzzles, etc.

During this meeting we were asked to commit if we were interested in spending a night in the “bush” (aka jungle) in a mud hut with the widows. In the past when I had heard this I thought, “No way! There is no way I could do that!” But, I found myself signing up. I just know that I will regret it if I go all the way there and do not do this. One night -- I can do that. Right? I will not be alone. We do have to pay a little more for this experience. This cost covers the expense of a mattress and a mosquito net and possibly a lantern (not sure about that one). The next day after our stay we will donate our beds and bedding, etc. to a widow. I imagine that in our one night there we will be sleeping in luxury compared to many there.

We also talked about the daily itineraries and tasks at hand. We are going to be busy! I am going to be working with teaching reading to women and also in leading Bible studies. I’m sure I will get my hands in a few other areas as well.

One of the days that we are there, we are going to put on a Valentine’s day party for the Karamojong children (I encourage you to read about this tribe and these children on the Smile Africa link below on this page). We are going to decorate cookies that we are bringing (praying they all make it there without breaking into too many pieces) and playing games and just loving on them. I am going to lead some time with some of the widows during this party. I am hoping to have lots of supplies for them (approximately 100 women) to each make at least one card for another woman to encourage each other and build one another up. I am really looking forward to this! If you have any stickers that would be appropriate for this activity (keeping in mind that many are illiterate, so pictures – hearts, etc. are good) that you would like to donate, please let me know.

1 John 4:11-12 -- The Message Version

My dear, dear friends, if God loved us like this, we certainly ought to love each other. No one has seen God, ever. But if we love one another, God dwells deeply within us, and his love becomes complete in us—perfect love!

Planning for Uganda

Here are some women I can't wait to meet (and Rachel Eggum-Cinader -- one of our mission team leaders and one of my personal heroes :-))

It is less than four weeks now from when I will leave for Uganda. I am excited. I am consciously stopping myself from saying, "I am scared" or "terrified", etc. There is no turning back and I need to remove those words from my vocabulary in regards to this trip and just let myself enjoy the planning and anticipation of what lies ahead.

I don't know exactly what I will be doing there. I am going to teach something. What will I teach? I can teach reading or writing (I just hope I have more patience with them than I have with my children!!!). I have been praying about it in a panic that I want to know what I am going to do or teach. Of course, I want an answer NOW so that I can plan, but things don't always work out that way. I have felt an overwhelming feeling though that I am going to be used to help the widows that I meet strengthen their community. I feel like I need to impress upon them the value of coming together (not living in isolation) and supporting and encouraging one another. That is the seed I feel that has been planted in me. We shall see how this develops.

So, for now I am making lists, updating a master calendar for Darrin. Making emergency contact lists, buying a SIM card for my phone for Uganda and hoping it works there!, planning my workload distribution at work.....trying to make sure that all my 'bases are covered'. We have a team meeting this Saturday and I get to meet many others that I will be traveling with and serving together. I so look forward to this time. Many have been before, so I can ask my list of questions to help me to prepare. Although, my friend Laverne has been to Uganda at least 2 or 3 times now and will be joining me on this trip. She is super business oriented and more driven to planning than I am (she is a Six Sigma expert for those that know about that -- so SUPER process driven!!). She laughed at me when I told her that I was trying to put together a plan for my time there. She told me that I can't plan this time. It is out of my hands and most things in Africa never go as planned. Talk about a challenge for me....NO planning.....out of MY hands? Sheesh...Okay, God, I get it! I give......it's all Yours! :-)

I hope that I am able to update this post while in Uganda. Please check back or 'subscribe' and if I can get to an Internet cafe or access to someone's computer (I don't have a laptop to take), I will post some updates.

Counting down the days, Jodi